Chronicle of Fraser

life goes on

2009-05-15T23:19:00.002+08:00

i missed my maths and social studies paper. and i hav decided not to retake it. i didnt study for any of those 2. i am still taking all the meds. doing ok. but constantly tired. heard from others that this med will just make ppl more aware of their surrounding including themselves. thus u will be more aware that u are tired making it seems like u are easily tired. thats wat i heard from others but who knows. currently no longer have problem counting things. reading things still got abit of a problem though. esp in a noisy environment. i will have to read the same line for atleast 3 times for me to even understand.

hope for the better.
=D

Have been feeling good this few days.

2009-05-10T15:57:00.002+08:00

i had stopped taking my anti-depressant because after i stop taking it, i realised that my mood is once again back on track. i am now able to feel things, enjoy things, ect but ritalin has totally removed my appetite. just had gastric pain last night due to the lack of food intake.

now i just wonder what would become of me. i really hope that i could study, get into poly and lead a normal life. i would not ask for more. i have learned to be contented. i have learned to stop asking for more and be happy with what i have.

life is short. i cannot go on searching, asking, seeking to be more perfect, for better stuff and for a more luxurious life style or i would end up exhausting myself and dying before i can even enjoy any fruit of labour.

i believe there is more to life then just all this surface, superficial and physical needs(or rather wants). There is something more skin-deep, something warmer to life.

i have yet to find out what it is.
no rush.
slowly =)

Hey

2009-05-07T10:39:00.003+08:00

feeling really happy yesterday and today.

yesterday managed to drag myself to the gym just to realise, i lose muscle mass and alot of strength.

have yet to gain back my 5kg.
really need to eat more and carry on my weight training.

i really hope everythings gonna be alright.

Dreadful life

2009-05-06T23:16:00.007+08:00

haiz. saw my psychiatry once more. costed me $324 this time round.
when i saw the bill, i almost wanted to jump down from the office.
just within this month, i had spent $772 just my medical bills.

I free so bad wasting so much of my parents money.

anyways,

after taking medicine, i no longer feel anything. ANYTHING AT ALL. all i do is stare at the wall,
and only talk to people when being talked to. my brain feels so~ dead.

that was the only time in my life when i dun fear neither death nor hell. i can picture myself stuffing down all the medicine the psychiatry prescribed to me and see myself foaming at my mouth lying on my bed with the door locked.

haha, that just some imagination.

well, i can only hope life gets better.

today, i am in a rather happy mood.

lets hope tomorrow gets better.

=D

jst reached sg

2009-05-04T00:22:00.002+08:00

i was fed with the wrong info... i am supposed to go Fraser's Hill.. Not cameron...

anyways, i vomited due to motion sickness on my way down...

will post more... need to get some rest and get ready fo schl tomorrow.

will post pic when i get the pics from my uncle.

nitez all

Still no zeal and life

2009-05-01T02:44:00.002+08:00

haha... another lifeless day. dun know wat to do.

but anyways, i would be going to cameron highland for 3 days.
hope it would do me good.

i am once again taking my pills, why? coz i decide to trust the doctor BUT i am taking only half the quantity.

alright damn late le.. me going to slp
will post pic and updates when i come back.

Nitez all.

Haiz

2009-04-28T17:59:00.004+08:00

again i dont feel right.
morning was hyper-active. just feel like running around, jumping up and down.
at late noon, i was totally lifeless. i feel that even if a car were to bang me, i wun have the will to tell myself to live on. today only ate 1 chicken pie and 1 bar of chocolate.

From tomorrow onwards, i will offically stop taking my pills. the effects are far too drastic.
i lost 5kg due to the lost of appetite.

i can feel that a tiny part of me is weeping. so tiny that i can only feel it sometimes. i do not feel sad about it but there is another part of me that just wants to give up everything and have as much fun as i can which is the stronger feeling that is affecting me.

i do not know what has become of me.
i gave up on the pills, on myself and on god.
i feel so helpless, so lifeless and so dead.

i am not trying to emo or self pity, i had already tried my best.

Updating for 2 day

2009-04-26T21:26:00.002+08:00

all i did was slack, slack and slack...
bored stiff...
lol...

didnt attend church today because there is something i dun like about my church but i am not going to say it... it might affect other's thinking...

consider changing church... but which church will allow me to serve in their music minstery...

but doesnt really matter... i can serve God using other ways...

mood hav been ok... saturday was more temperamental while sunday was slackday...
i think i am slowing going back to my oldself...

4th day on medication

2009-04-25T01:44:00.005+08:00

did well in maths and biology. memory slowly coming back.
able to sleep, wake up and eat well.

really happy but it seems to hav made me a little more temperamental.

concentration actually helps me to gym properly as well. as i am able to focus my will power to do workout.

my indoor tanning session is about to finish. should u carry on?
=X till i save money 1st ba...

need to rest and regulate sleeping hours...
good nite...

another Lifeless day

2009-04-24T01:15:00.001+08:00

ZZZzz... ZZZZzzzz... once again i missed half a day of lessons schl due to overslept.

i seem to be able to sleep again. well at least thats what i really hope but i am still emotionless.
its really tiring. sometime i will try to feel if i am sad or happy. but i just cant feel anything.

every1 around me is asking me to lessen my dosage but i really want it to work and heal me.
i dun know if i should listen to the doc or the ppl.

anyways, i am rushing through my writing cause i need to sleep early.
well, going to slp liao.
nitez.

dear diary

2009-04-23T00:20:00.005+08:00

today had been a long day. it has been weeks since i didnt miss a single lesson for awhole day.

feeling lethargic and zombie-like lifelessness.

Had been stoic and rather hard for me to laugh at things and enjoy relaxing and beautiful environments.

In simpler terms, i cant feel anything(emotions) at all. The only thing i can feel is the tiredness setting in due to the consecutative lack of sleep for the pass few nights and because of the newly introducted medication.

i guess that there is a price to pay for everything. like for my instance, i would need to give up my senses and ability to sleep well.

i just got back from marina barrage with Marran, Sean and mr insecurity(xaiver).

some pictures =D finally

Good night?

2009-04-21T23:17:00.002+08:00

zzz. i only managed to sleep at 5.30am. was unable to sleep which i strongly believe is due to my medication. my medication was supposed to boost up my concentration but i took it at the timing that was a little too near bed time.

went to play badminton with my church friends just to exhaust myself so that i could sleep well tonight.
pretty tired though. =X

i am going to turn in early today.
nitez all.

Sad

2009-04-21T00:31:00.005+08:00

i am a failure. i am stuck. i try my best to make my parents happy. i cant study yet i cant make my parents disown me. it's a curse to have me.

For your info, i am not emo-ing. i am stating a fact/difficulty in my life.

i am a boring person because i had been forced to be a adult, and to face this world alone since i was a kid.
i am a sad person as i have never experience true happiness in my own burrow since i was a kid.
i do not know how to love for i had never experience the sweetness of love.
And i would fly so high that i will die of suffocation due to the high multitude and low oxygen level because i had been heavily deprived of freedom and the defiance and rash nature that had set in me.
I blamed my parents but i was told they were not to be blamed.
The only person i can blame is, myself.
It's fate that i led such a life.
it's fate that brought this upon me.
when i later found out that fate was just a reason for people to escape reality and responsibility,
i resigned.
i resign myself to life.

ps: i had been diagnose with ADD(Attention Deficit Disorder) by my psychiatry.

just another mediocre sunday

2009-04-19T22:09:00.003+08:00

today, my mood had been pretty good.

after nearly 3 weeks of absence from church, i finally decided to go back "home".
been going through some couselling. hopeful it will aid me in my ability to face the hash reality of life.

i suspect that i have mild bipolar disorder. at times i just feel on top of the world and at times, i feel like i am falling down a bottomless pit. when i am down, everyone around me gets affect, i feel really dejected and guilty for bringing such distressfulness to every living soul around me.

But all these bad things aside, i am really looking forward to entering Poly.
My DREAM(note: its only a dream) of getting 12 points for o levels seems like mission impossible. Nevertheless, i will preserver.(just hope my preserverance can last me long enough before another breakdown/burn out/lowkey/meltdown.)

tomorrow i am going to see a physiatrist regarding my concentration problem.
let hope i get it healed up, at least 1 less issue to tackle.
wish me luck and pray for me.
thank you
fraser
(",)

Hi all

2009-04-18T18:02:00.004+08:00

LOL... long long time sinced i blog, recently, many things happened to me in life.

Now mid term in Chec(city harvest education centre). almost gave up half way through.

latest update:
i got myself a new white specs,
i died my hair red,
i signed up for california gym (getting fitter),
i signed up for indoor tanning (rather tanned),
i just got a ipod touch,
i got rejected once,
currently climbing up and trying to standup from the lowest point of my life,
losing my brains ability to concentrate.

haha that more or less sum up for all the updates.

and i really hav to openly delcare that i love mrs.marran and mr.bear;
lover/soulmate of my life.

will post a few pic
when i get to take pictures.. haha

Long time no post

2008-12-30T14:04:00.007+08:00

Its been a long time since i posted. Due to my hectic lifestyle, i find it demanding to post every single shit thus i had decided to post only when there are importants events/happenings.

Past Mrs.Maran's birthday. Her birthday celebration was held at St.James, boiler room. with a crowd of about 20 Mrs.Maran's friend.

Took only a few pics.

Went KL instead of thailand due to stupid riots there.

stayed 2 nights at a villa with private pool at Malacca, followed by a night at genting, then to KL and lastly PortDickson sea Resort. 7days 6nights. with my my family.

And a good news, i got though the entry test at CHEC (city harvest edu center) for a 1 year 0 level course, taking English, Combined Science(bio/phy), Maths, Combined Humanities(geo/social) and Econs.

i have to thnk my sister for teaching me her sec 2 maths and thank all my chruch mate who prayed for me and of course my heavenly father.

Thats all for now, hope i live long enough to post the next post.

bless all.

KL Trip

2008-11-13T00:29:00.012+08:00

Its been a long long time since i blogged.. i wanted to blog but i had to get the pictures of our KL trip before i could post anything. So finally, i got it from Mrs.maran.

After i came back from KL, i had sore throat followed by high fever and was unable to attend Mr.bears birthday celebration.

I would say that our trip was far too long. it would have been perfect if it was 3days 2 nights instead of 5days 4 night. Resulting in wastage of money spent on food and accommodation.

When we set off, we were surprisingly quite claim and quiet despite the fact of the anticipation and excitement we felt the few days before. perhaps we were already numb towards excitement after the long wait. =X

It was about 9.30pm and it was raining very heavily. we went up the bus with wet footwear, sat down and started to take a few pictures to mark the start of our journey.

Mr.Bear was contemplating if we would make it back alive and he seem reluctant to enjoy himself until,

they distributed complimentary Tao Sa buns.
It was a lifesaver. Instantly, he found the energy to pose a picture.
How relief was i.

And next, Mrs.Maran was saying her last goodbyes to her mum with her *blink blink* iphone.
she was worried sick.

And of cause, being a human who is so understanding, i naturally felt uneasy and sad.
Actually, it was because i was cold >.<>

2.30 hours later, we finally reached Yong Peng. They were all happy and so glad we stopped of fooooood. once again they were gleaming. Phew.

After eating 4 plates of Mee Ru Bus each, there was an announcement saying our bus would be leaving shortly. Unwillingly without finishing our 5th bow of Mee Ru Bus, we left the place.

Finally reached our hotel at 4am. i suddenly miss the games in my phone so, i set down to play some games on my phone.

_______________________________

after haf a day of rest, we set off to Time Square.

Which after 5mins of shopping, they decided that they are hungry, so we settled down for starbucks.

we ate 6 toast each and 2 cups of cappuccino

It was CREAMALICIOUS!

Yum Yum Lick-My-LipLIOUS!

we ate at starbucks for 6 hours and finally decided to call it a day.

___________________________________

the next day,

After sleeping for 10 hours, we went to a bar near twin tower to chill to wait for night fall.

Its a special bar cause there is a pathway that lead this bar to another part of the bar.

And this pathway rains once for 5 mins every one hour.

We played there all day. We waited there and played 3 rounds of rains.

It was SO much fun. water was sprayed down from the wall with a pipe above to simulate rain.

WOW~ we were totally into it. it was such a amazing sight that water falls down from the sky -.-

i cant wait to go there again.

it was nearing night fall as we set of to the twin tower.

Magnificent Sight eh?

A&W long time no see. thus we settled down for a heartily meal

me and Mr.bear enjoying our meal.

Thats how it looked like at night.

there are waterfalls just outside the twintower...

beautiful place.

went back to rest for awhile. Waited for 12mn so that the cyber cafe there would hav discount.

They wanted to check mail, talk in msn and play some games.

As the finale event for the day, we decided to give ourselves a facial.
_______________________

the next day, we went to a super market with Mrs.maran's mum and friends.

Bitches that wanna act like witches

After that, went to back hotel to change and come out again to meet for dinner!

CRABS!!! SEA FOOD!!! WOOOO!!!

Mrs.Maran's mum's friend gave us a treat.

_______________________

Finally the time for us to go.

Mrs.Maran is huggging her pillow goodbye.

Taking coach back!!! Finally!! haha.. GG!!
__________________________________________

Sorry ah, a lot more things didnt get to post, too tiring to post everything.

i bought 1 puma shoe, 3 t-shirts, 2 wallets and gained 3kg of excess fats.

But because as mentioned earlier, i got sick and managed to shed off that 3kg.

Overall, a very fun and memorable trip.

2 Humps up.

Computer got problem... zzz...

2008-10-22T14:17:00.014+08:00

Srry for being away... my computer got attitude...

Anyways, came back from GENTING!! HAHA...

came back le and had so much fun... slept a lot there... hehe...

my 2 sisters eating at yong peng(i dun know how the F to spell it)
F & F. (Fiona & Food).

we reach the entrance of First World hotel.

after that went to ripley's believe it or not.
too many fanciful stuff to show.

The Biggest Chair of the world largest man.

my sis praying for the wounded.

World tallest man.

wacky mirror
Showed me how i looked like if i had boobs.
And my sis with Amy whinehouse beehive hairdo.

Cool vampire slayer kid...

to kill vampires like me(i only feed on mental power).... ^.^

after that went out door theme park...

PLEASE DO NOT SIT.
But eh, Who cares.
CamWhores will do whatever it takes. =)

Viking Ride.
My sis with her constipated look.
She is scared.

took this stupid dun-know-wat-u-called boat
i went alone and its damn tiring.
genting so cold but i cycle this till i sweat.

Me and my sis on go-kart.

Finally returning back to sg.

_________________________

1 more day-tomorrow!!! KL here i come. YAY!! WAHAHA
Mum giving me additional 400rm to spend for shopping. yay. haha.
HAPPY HAPPY LOH!!

Plannings

2008-10-11T03:24:00.008+08:00

Genting Highland trip 12.10.08 -15.10.08

KL trip 23.10.08 - 28.10.08
__________________________

Finally we(Mr.bear, Mrs.maran & me) sat down, did some planning for our KL trip and set off to book tickets and some admin stuff. Lol.

we went once before to KL though we got ourself hotel room, went around KL shopping all by ourselves, transportation(to and from SG to KL) was all planned by Mrs.Maran's mum.

We went to golden mile after collecting passport from ICA Building. Registered for GrassLand coach services and Mrs.Maran using her *bLiNk*bLiNk* Iphone to log on to the internet to book us a hotel.
__________________________
Setting aside
- Transport to KL => SG$35
- Transport back to SG => RM$35
- Accommodation(for 5 days 4 nights at a hotel) => RM$100
- Food => RM$80
- SHOPPING!!! => RM$150

Total: - SG$35, RM$370(365 round up)

hope i set aside enough =X
__________________________

Freaking people said i fat.... zzzz
i almost reaching 70kg only what... lol... for me to be over weight, i hav to be 85kg leh..
i go gym MINIMUM 3 TIMES A WEEK AND AT LEAST 2 HOURS EACH leh..
is called bulky not fat OK...
=X
*roll eyes

Happening

2008-10-05T02:28:00.008+08:00

LOL... wow...
lots and lots of things and happenings..

On 01.10.08 went to Earle Swensen's located at the top of changi airport T3. Food was not bad. Buffet style salad bar.

Guess what my grandma is having... lol... lobster... look at the way she devours it.. WOah... haha
____________________________________________________
05.09.08

Went prawning. Its located at the junction of Pasir Ris Coast Industrial Park 2 and Pasir Ris Coast Industrial Park 1.

So fun. lol.

1st 2 pics is Joan(available contact me for details) and my sis(too young).
3rd pic is my cute cousin Aaron(available(i guess) contact me for details)
4th pic is both my cute aunts.

All of us enjoyed ourself.
_______________________________

And after the pawning, went for roti plata.

Sis cam Whoring, my mum and me, dad and sis.

Not bad. haha happening.

The best is yet to come... still waiting for genting(family), KL trip(Babies) and Thailand trip(family).

Anticipation.

A Night At East Coast Park

2008-09-25T00:21:00.009+08:00

Lol... Fun... went there, set up tent, start fire, BBQ food and Dig in. Yummy. haha
Had, beef steak with sliced Orange and Green capsicum, asparagus grilled along with alcohol.
Had salmon grilled lightly with pepper. Had honey grazed grilled chicken. Had many many meat balls and lots and lots of hot dog. Did not sleep at all.

Quite a night to experince. Was Fun

Night Fall.

Playing Psp in tent lol.

Meditating.

Me and Mr.Bear doing Yoga LOL.

3 of us.

Woah. Nicest picture ever taken of me.

Thnk you my dear Mrs.Maran.

Sun finally rised.

Thats me. Mr.EmoDepresso

Fraser.

Blogging Once Again.

2008-09-23T14:44:00.002+08:00

Really busy this few days.
Went Clubbing,
Went to the Malay night bazaar,
Went to watch Disaster Movie
(no wonder they name it Disaster Movie, really sucky show.)
Always Not enough sleep.
Know a lot of people.
Not bad, widen my social circle.

Then tonight Mrs.Maran, Mr.Bear and me gonna spend our night camping at eastcoast park.
Soooo coool... We are gonna hav red wine, Grilled Chicken, Nice music and a cosy tent. lol.
Will update the rest tomorrow when i get home
=P

A whole day of outing

2008-09-16T01:00:00.027+08:00

When out to the gym in the morning with mr.bear to the gym.
After that, went to queens town with mr.bear to buy shoe.
After finish shopping, when to meet mrs.maran to get her skirt at far-east.
End up both got nothing. zzz -.-
But it's ok at least they did not waste their money buying something they might not be comfortable in.

My sleeping problem seems like its coming back. Feeling very lethargic in the day time despite at least 7 hours of uninterrupted sleep.

Still thinking about k once in a while.
Especially when there are things that resembles k.
I just cannot help it.

"Better in time"

by Leona Lewis.

[chorus]

thought i couldn't live without you

its gonna hurt when it heals to

it'll all get better in time

even though i really love you

i'm gonna smile cause i deserve to

it'll all get better in time

_________

since there's no more you and me

its time i let you go so i can be free

and live my life how it should be

no matter how hard it is ill be fine without you

yes i will

My(final) poem for K.

2008-09-16T01:00:00.024+08:00

before, after and then finally good bye.

Before i met you -
I looked forward to nothing, and life is meaningless.
I hated life and thought, why am i even here in this universe.

When i first met you -
Every time i see you, i feel happy and revitalised.
Only then i realised, i finally had a purpose in life.

After getting to know you -
I think about you day and night.
My life was in darkness but you were my light.
The thought of you makes the gloomiest day bright.

When i fall for you -
Although you meant the world to me, you were never ever mine.
Its only fair that i left you alone, to carry on, without any binds.
Thanks for the memories, though i wished i never had.
Because every time i think about you i would feel extremely sad.
At time i will even cry because it hurts me real bad.

My final Thoughts for you -
Although I'll always say i only treat you as a friend, deep inside me, i know its a lie
I really love you but this time, I would have to say good bye.

Written By Fraser.
Only For K.

This will be the last thing i would ever post online about k.
I had decided to stop seeing k.
Farewell.
___________
i ment every single word about it.

sad and emo day

2008-09-16T01:00:00.011+08:00

Damn i m feeling so sad... i dun know if i m love sick or what... why do people call it heartache when my whole body is aching... haiz... no i did not get rejected(because k is still attached thus i did not even confess)... its just how things had been going on between us...

i really hope its not all one sided... do you not feel the even the slightest bit of my affection for you?

i can feel my emotion sinking even after a run(which is supposed to make people feel good due to the production of endorphins.) What should i do next? Carry on as though everything is fine? or forget about k and move on?
but what if i cannot forget about k?

Damn this godforsaken love. Just feel like giving everything up.

____________________________
REFLECTION

i still have God, i can still turn to Him, He knows me best.

Be with me O Lord. Strengthen me. Only He will never give up on me or break promises.

Just another day

2008-09-13T23:37:00.011+08:00

slept at 5am Woke up at 12+ but still very tired coz i tired to drug myself. -.-' the medicine didnt make me high instead make me damn tired the whole day. lol.. i think wrong drugs. so tired and sleep that i slp at 4pm. Then K (see 1 week after ord!! to know who k is) called me say going to hg gym. Then went gym with K but didnt work out. keep having stomach ache. followed K all around the gym. quite happy to go out and see K. walk K to hougang mall then take 101 bus back home.
__________________
now planing my trip to kl with mr.bear and mrs.maran
__________________
God, please grant me wisdom in everything i do or plan. Thank you God. Love you God.

1 week after ord!!

2008-09-12T03:39:00.004+08:00

LOL.. Everybody told me that i would feel lost if i did not have plan after Ns but honestly, i my plan was to slack, which was not actually a proper plan... haha.. and i do not feel lost...

My health and my mental strength is slowing recovering to how it was before i had sleeping problems.. i have to thank everyone that prayed for me..

Recently met someone(a name i gave: 'k') that is really cute and outgoing nevertheless, attached...
haha hope that someday, if God permits, we'd be together.. (no details would be given just yet till things are stablised).

K and i watched movie our 1st movie...

4bia... i do not really like horror movies but that show was quite okay. or maybe i had grown up. who knows =X
___________________________________

Cannot wait to go overseas with my family. going thailand.. than after that going KL with my dear maran and bear... haha.. so happy...

Finally ORD-ed!

2008-09-09T00:30:00.013+08:00

Morning Went to church. Had a speaker from India. He came with a massage telling us that God is going to bless us and quoted a few verses.

Went to Grapevine to chill with my dear Mrs.Maran & Mr.Bear straight after church.Was really tired.

Me(Left)
Bear(right)
Maran and me(Bottom)

___________________________________________________

REFLECTION

Have to thank everybody from the bottom of my heart especially those that have encouraged and push me through the pass 2 years of my life.

Army had made me more superficial(maybe practical would be a better choice of word but who knows). i do not like who i had became. made me more inhumanely. made me lose the sensitive side of me. now i cannot feel what other people feels. oh God. Please change me. Those are not the qualities your want us to have.

Tomorrow ORD!

2008-09-05T01:54:00.009+08:00

Finally. the day i that i had been long anticipating finally arrived. Accordingly to directives, every Ord personal is to complete a clearance form with signatures of all their Superior. for me, all can be obtain expect my RSM(regimental sergeant major) the 2nd biggest Fcuk in my company. He is away on leave. Damn. pray that there would be a way out. i dun mind not getting my pink ic yet. as long as i finish serving my liable period, and its officially over, i am fine with anything.

well, finally got rid of my old phone M600i and got myself a new camera phone C902. 5 mega pixel. Small screen and hang on quite a regular basis. Bought myself a GATSBY HI-BLEACH. Me getting ready to welcome my old self(original self). LOL.

Last but not least before i end off my blogging today, i really sincerely wish that everyone from 3discom would lead a better life there. Though somethings need not be brought up, even the blind can tell whats becoming of discom. i would keep the welfare of discom in my prayer. (it needs lotsa prayer).

Thank God this little part of my life is finally over. Time to move on to the next phrase in life.

wonder how many more phrases i m left with before returning home to my heavenly father.

Good bye my Hp u had served me well.
_______________

LOL time to get vain. =P

____________________

Good bye Army

4 days away from ord

2008-09-02T14:35:00.003+08:00

Finally computer ok liao... damn sian... now still once in a while will blue screen and auto shut down... actually not very excited about ord... the feeling is different from 5 month ago when it comes to thinking about ord... perhaps is because of clearing offs and leaves that allow me to slowly adjust to the civilian world... after ord intend to work a bit to wait for schl reopening... me going to study nitech in multi-media... after that go poly and get into business informatics... and then finally after getting diploma, go to my dads company to help out... Crossed fingers hope that i will do well this time...

after all this so many days of "sicklyness", i finally return to my gyming routine. wahaha... 1st thing i wanna do after i ord is to DYE MY HAIR!!! yehaaaa!! lol... i like to get myself high for no reason...
(1521)

COMP SPOIL

2008-08-29T00:11:00.000+08:00

my damn comp spoiled... zzzz... reformatted it... stupid computer... waste my damn time... Mc 4th time this month... shows how sickly i m... sick asshole.. Finally 1 more week ord loh... haha... no more pay still got ord treat sian...

After Saf Chalet

2008-08-26T12:18:00.000+08:00

The chalet was stupid.. damn piece of shit.. nice place, nice environment.. but with stupid ppl there to control your every movement.. although its Saf chalet BUT its a chalet after all.. losers play with rank.. got rank can talk.. like my friend always quote "got rank still need to eat rice, turn old still will die what." Stupid ppl.. losers in life that's why need rank to feel Superior.. nvm.. Every bitch has its day, just let them have it..

morning did a treasure hunt.. losers get to clean up the place(kinda like a punishment for losing)
walk damn far to get to check points.. leg still hurt from AHM(army half marathon).. got to see some of my friends who had ord-ed.. wasted my day off there but nevertheless, take it as my ord celebration..
(1226pm)

Ahm

2008-08-24T23:30:00.000+08:00

yay... finished my finale event, the 21km Ahm(Army Half Marathon)... that's some bullshit waste of time... but like hey, i would only do that once in a life time =P quite an achievement for me... i lost some tummy in the process... damn tiring... slpt at 2am and gotta reach stupid cityhall by 5.30am for dun know wat fcuk -.- army really rush to wait and wait to rush sia... kns... tired like hell and leg ache like i hav not learn to walk but start to run liao... going to slp to get back as much rest as i can get... nitez...
(12pm)

after a 3 hours nap, went to meet mr wong xiong loong for his birthday.. had a really really hard time deciding where to go... nv had such a hard time planning birthday event for any1 but him =X
in the end went to yuki yaki at marina square to eat some steamboat... too tired no appetite.. wasted but was quite a nice gathering..
ok i need to slp liao.. tomorrow going S.A.F chalet... nitez...
(11 pm)

to God be the glory for all that had happened today including surviving the run...

Yet another day(230808)

2008-08-23T02:50:00.000+08:00

Gonna Ord loh... wahaha... thinking through the pass 2 year... really was some kind of an experience... tainted me completely... made me understand myself and what i m capable of doing in order to survive...

survival of the fittest it sure is... but thats not what i wanna learn... can i overcome and change my mindset that had been in-build in me for the pass 2 years? i believe so... with Gods help, some determination and REALLY nice friends(thnk God for them).

Latez le.. i wanna go slp liao...
zzzzzz...

Life (220808)

2008-08-22T11:19:00.000+08:00

Been through many moments of life where you just want to give up everything that you have but amazingly, behind every perfect storm, there's a sliver lining.

Then again, its the balance in life to have good times and bad allowing us to realise how much we take certain things for granted. Its the good times and the bad times that allow buddies/interpersonal relationship to bond stronger and to know each other's true colour.

Its the existence of bad times that allow us to further enjoy the sweet moments of good times and its the memories of good times that can pull us through that sad and gloomy bad times in our life.

Its the equilibrium of life.

Thank you God for the good times and bad times in life.

Happy times in my life.